Are These Unhelpful Beliefs Holding You Back?

Your beliefs about yourself and your life have more power over your existence than you might ever be able to imagine. Personal ideas and values you’ve held for the longest time can block your way to creating the life you want and deserve, leaving you feeling stuck and helpless. 

Identifying your unhelpful beliefs and replacing them with positive ones is key.

unhelpful beliefs

Let´s take a look at some of the unhelpful beliefs that may be holding you back and keeping you from living the live you´ve always dreamed of… 

“I ought to let go of my dreams because I´m never going to achieve them.”

A couple problems come up when you think this way.

First, because you feel undeserving of your dreams, you begin to self-sabotage. And second, chances are you won´t make the effort to do the things that would move you closer to your goals.

  • One way to change this belief is to think about what it is you need to actually do to follow your dreams. Make a list of the steps you need to take to live the life you want to live. See these as a staircase to your dreams, and then begin climbing those steps, one by one.
  • Your new belief might sound something like, “I’m following my dreams starting today and I celebrate each step I achieve along the way.”

“I don’t have the right to ask for what I want because I fear rejection.”

This unhelpful belief indicates you feel less important than others. You don´t see your wants and needs as relevant to others. People who live with this belief often keep their true feelings under wraps and simply go with the flow in order to get along with others. The last thing they want to do is rock the boat!

  • The honest fact is though that your feelings are just as valuable as everyone else’s. Consider changing this belief to, “I am important and how I feel matters to me. I can diplomatically ask for what I want. Others may disagree, but I can handle it.”
  • Learning to state your needs and wants in an honest and tactful manner, without anger, makes it easier for those around you to open up, listen and respond favorably.
  • However, even if they respond negatively, remind yourself that you have no control over their feelings. What you DO have control over are your own feelings and action. So, don´t be afraid to ask for what you want.

 “I’m not going to trust anyone again.”

This belief may stem from a time in your past when someone you trusted hurt you.

  • Perhaps, when you were younger, your parents were unsupportive or tough on you. Or in you felt betrayed in a past relationship. Whatever the case, it sounds like you’re afraid to trust and you’re trying to protect yourself from further emotional hurt.
  • To change this belief you will need to give yourself permission to trust again. If you´re not willing to do this, chances of having another loving relationship in your life are slim to none.
  • Recognize that you probably learned something positive from prior relationships – even if they were negative. You’ve grown and your ideas about what you want are clearer now.
  • You can adopt a belief along these lines, “In order to have a relationship, I must invest in it. It may be scary at first, but I can do it.”

“I don’t make enough money to live a financially secure life.”

This belief puts a heavy burden on your efforts to be happy. When you think this way, you fail to see what you can do to save for your future. Your emotional health is intimately connected to how you feel about your financial life.

  • Open the door to a more secure financial and emotional life by adjusting your belief to, “I have control over my finances and I can save X dollars per week.”
  • When you believe you can live within or below your financial means and still save, you’ll discover just how much you can enjoy your life.

Make a point of closely examining your major values and beliefs. What is it you think about yourself? Are your thoughts and beliefs preventing you from enjoying a healthy relationship, creating a financially secure future, or living the life you´ve always dreamed of?

Banishing your limiting beliefs is the only way to do any of those things. And YOU are the only one who can banish them. Start now.

 

About the Author Jan Marie Mueller

Jan Marie Mueller is founder of the inspirational blog ThinkBrilliantly and The Brilliance Community, a free Facebook group dedicated to empowering women to let their inner brilliance shine! Her mission is to help women everywhere shift the way they think about themselves, their world and those around them so they have the confidence to do, be and have what they want most in life!

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